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Category:
Christmas
Question: What's red and white and gives presents to good little fish on Christmas?
Answer: Sandy Claws.
2: -
Category:
Christmas
Question: What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
Answer: Frostbite.
3: -
Category:
Christmas
Question: What do you get when you cross an archer with a gift-wrapper?
Answer: Ribbon hood.
4: -
Category:
Christmas
Question: What do snowmen eat for breakfast?
Answer: Snowflakes.
5: -
Category:
Christmas
Question: What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus?
Answer: Claustrophobic.
6: -
Category:
Christmas
Question: Why was Santa's little helper depressed?
Because he had low elf esteem.
7: -
Category:
Christmas
Question: Why does Santa have 3 gardens?
So he can ho-ho-ho.
8: -
Category:
Christmas
Mrs Oppenheimer decided to get away from the often inclement weather of New York and spend Christmas in the deep South of the USA. Being unfamiliar with that part of the world she wandered into a 'restricted' hotel and said 'Hi. I'm Mrs Oppenheimer and I'd like a room for the next week.' 'I'm very sorry,' said the manager, but all our rooms are taken. Just as he said that a customer came to the desk and unexpectedly checked out. 'How lucky' responded Mrs Oppenheimer, 'Now you have a room for me.' 'Look, I'm very sorry' said the manager, but this is a restricted hotel. Jews are not allowed here. 'Jewish! Whaddya mean Jewish. I happen to be a Catholic.' 'That takes some believing' said the manager. Tell me, who was the Son of God?' 'Jesus.' she replied 'Where was he born?' 'In a stable in Bethleham..... simply because some Schmuck like you wouldn't rent a room to a Jew.'
9: -
Category:
Christmas
Q Why doesn't Santa have any children ?
A Because he only comes once a year, and when he does, it's down the chimney.
10: -
Category:
Christmas
Q How are a Christmas tree and a priest alike ?
A They both have ornamental balls.
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